Sunday, October 03, 2004

 

Another Interview with our beloved reporter.

Reporter: I see that you mentioned under your status that you are single and bored.
Me: Yes, and what's wrong with that?
Reporter: You sounded like you are a despo.
Me: I am.
Reporter: You know people don't really admit that they are despos.
Me: I did.
Reporter: Why?
Me: I'm honest.
Reporter: Is that a trick to convince any secret admirers that you are a good person?
Me: Duh. No.
Reporter: Then...
Me: No one admires me, as far as i know. All those who admires me have expired.
Reporter: What do you mean?
Me: Well, most girls who admired me now admires some other guys. They lost interest.
Reporter: Thats sad. How come?
Me: How i know?
Reporter: Why you donno?
Me: Because i never cared. I regretted it.
Reporter: IC. Anyway, who is this Amanda person?
Me: Just a friend.
Reporter: I heard that you classmates say that she is just an imaginative friend?
Me: To that, i think that either they are too jealous, or either they are an apple, or arse, or both.
Reporter: I'm afraid i have to censor it again
Me: Please do. I donno what i'm toking about.
Reporter: ...
Me: ... ...
Reporter: ... ... ...
Me: Stop "..."-ing
Reporter: Ok. So, er.. do you like amanda?
Me: As a friend, yes.
Reporter: Do you want her to be your girlfriend?
Me: Yes and no.
Reporter: Why?
Me: I want her to be my girlfriend because i'm despo. I don't want her to be my girlfriend because i don't think we match each other.
Reporter: IC. She loves you?
Me: I have no idea. I don't think so. But i think maybe she like me as a friend only.
Reporter: Are you sad?
Me: No. Can you ask something else, you are getting on my nerves.
Reporter: ok. Er... You have any girlfriend b4?
Me: I have no idea.
Reporter: Are you stupid?
Me: I think so.
Reporter: Do you want to fall in love again?
Me: I hope so.
Reporter: You have any targets in mind?
Me: I doubt so.
Reporter: Do you think your future relationship will last?
Me: I think so.
Reporter: Do you think that there are any secret admirer whom you have no idea of, since they are "sercet"?
Me: I hope so.
Reporter: Will you try to find out who they are?
Me: I doubt so.
Reporter: Ok.. Thats very informative.
Me: I think so.
Reporter: Okok... If a girl suddenly tells you that she loves you, what will you do?
Me: I'll slap myself.
Reporter: Huh? Why?
Me: Because i'm dreaming and its time to wake up.
Reporter: IC, but what if you are no dreaming?
Me: Well... first, i'll looking at how fat she is, and how ugly she looks.
Reporter: You mean you like fat and ugly girls?
Me: God! No! Do you?
Reporter: I have no idea.
Me: Then what kind of girls you like?
Reporter: I like girls with short hair, no chest, and no shape.
Me: Why?
Reporter: I donno.
Me: I see, then can you show me a photo of your wife?
Reporter: No...
Me: Why?
Reporter: I don't have a wife.
Me: How come?
Reporter: Because, i can't find a girl with totally no chest and no shape.
Me: I see. Can i intro you some guys instead?
Reporter: Maybe. Maybe i might fall in love with them.
Me: Ok, i introduce You Teo Kao Jun.
Reporter: Who is he?
Me: He's my ex-classmate. He's good with his studies, plays the pipa, and has no life.
Reporter: I see. He must be kind of interesting person to be around wif.
Me: I should think so.
Reporter: What is his handphone number?
Me: [censored]
Reporter: Ok, i'll call him when i'm free.
Me: Alright. I hope you 2 have happy ending.
Reporter: Ok. Thanks. Wait a minute!
Me: What?
Reporter: WTF! I'm suppose to ask you question!
Me: I think so too.
Reporter: Alright. Final question. If amanda tells you she likes you, what will you do?
Me: I'll have a heart attack.
Reporter: Why?
Me: I'll be too happy.
Reporter: IC. Anyway, if you are despo, why don't you look for other girls?
Me: No way.
Reporter: Why?
Me: Because i'm loyal.
Reporter: IC. Ok, i think that sums up all for today. I think someone has just commited suicide at the block opposite.
Me: How did you know?
Reporter: I saw him fall. I also saw him standing on the rooftop since our interview started.
Me: Why didn't you stop him?
Reporter: So that i can interview you.
Me: I feel so honoured. Is that the only reason?
Reporter: No. If he jumps, i have more work to do. So i earn more money. Its hard to earn a living these days.
Me: Ic. Ok. Goodbye.
Reporter: Ok, going to interview the person who commited suicide now. Bye!
Me [aside]: Can he talk to the dead?
[a ghostly voice]: No, but i can talk to the reporter in his dreams...

Comments: Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]





<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Subscribe to Posts [Atom]