Sunday, January 30, 2005


Story Relay Shooter

Wah lao... how can liddat! The story relay so fun, can relieve stress more effectively then the "Relaxing Beethoven Classics With Ocean Sounds" CD that amanda gave me for my birthday...

And you show off your econ skill somemore! What! You think your econ very pro izzit?

Let me give you some FACTS:

You never take into consideration that an average household holds more apples than pears in their house.

A young toddler learns what an apple is before he or she knows what a pear is.

There is a company by the name of "Apple", but there isn't any company by the name of "Pear".

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away". Who ever heard of "A pear a day keeps the doctor away"? Obviously people care about pears less than apples.

From the above, we know some basic things about apples. Firstly, it is more well known then pear, more often consumed than pears and people hold apples with higher regard then pears. Hence, there is no reason for farmers to plant excessive pears, but they have to plant more apple. If you think that apples are cheaper than pears, and it is because apples are more common, you are wrong.

iPods are one of the most common HD-based MP3 players around, yet their prices remained high. So you see, econs sucks. Computing is MUCH MUCH better.


int choice, result;

void main(){

cout << "Press one if you like apple, and 2 if you like pears.";
cin >> choice;
switch (choice){
case 1:
cout <<"You have made the right choice! You rule!";
case 2:
cout << "Wrong number, please try again.";
cout <<"You are so stupid, that you did not enter one or 2. You entered something lamer";


Story relay?

"Apples became common in Earth once again. This can be seen from the fact that an apple cost more than a pear." - Wicked.

Oi, Wicked, foul liao lah. Bloody hell. Trying to con me right? If apple is so common, the supply will be more than the demand and prices of apple will drop!!!!!! Hence, apple will cost less than a pear lah. I cant understand a nutcase about ur bloody essay leh. Hopeless gonecase filthy piece of essay. As such, I m proclaimed the winner of this story relay.... The proof is shown below, to convince the bloody Wicked that he's a loser.

Mathematical proof: (Fmaths+Econs stuff)
Suppose on the contrary that apples are very common (free good) on Earth,
Then Price of apple = MC
Hence, OC of apple = 0, since apples are of relative abundance of Earth.
The cost of an apple measured in the next best alternative forgone is zero.
However, Ppear > 0 because it is not of relative abudance.
Since Ppear > 0 while Papple = 0
Ppear > Papple for all values of P. P is a subset of all real numbers.

This is clearly a contradiction, since Papple > Ppear. Hence apples are not common on Earth. (QED)

However, because an apple of day keeps the doctor away,
MSC = MPC + Ext. cost

If take left to the society, the ext. cost would not be considered. Q1 - Q* > 0, implying overproduction in a pure market economy.

Hence govt interference i.e. in the form of tax by govt. to internalize ext cost, is required to prevent overproduction. If left to market forces, MSC = MPC hence there will be overconsumption, which is undesirable to the society.

Moral of the story, since apples are so complicated and troublesome and involves so many mathematical and economics calculation, which could not be understood, buy pear instead. It's so much more convenient.

Friday, January 28, 2005


Story Relay - Part3

The Earth continues on its slow course around the sun. The stars blinked happily in their never ending blinks. Three hundred rounds around the sun later, on a particular country located in a particular region of the Earth, a lone pear tree stood alone in a desert.

It admires the sunlight that helped in to grow, suck so much water from deep underground water springs in the desert that all the tribal people in this desert died from thirst. It felt guilty. Itfelt sad. It wanted to change, to change for the better, to help this world, to start life in this lifeless desert again.

It let out a high frequency call for help that no one can hear. Mother nature heard it though, and responded. Slowly but surely, the fruits assumed a spherical shape. Its green exteriors gradually turned red under the sun. Its taste improved, so as to attract more people to eat it.

The desert became populated again, with people flooding into the desert just to taste its juicy and cruchy fruits. The seeds were collected and distributed for far-sighted farmers to plant them on farms. Apples became common in Earth once again. This can be seen from the fact that an apple cost more than a pear.

Thursday, January 27, 2005


Story Relay - Part2

According to, the defination of 'name' is

A word or words by which an entity is designated and distinguished from others.

However, the apple, being stupid, dont know anything at all. That's why he gave himself such a stupid name. As such, the terrified boy reminded him that the stereotype of apple is wormless and munchy, while the creature is now being mutated and shouldnt be called apple. Hence, a preferred name is pear.

The creature agreed immediately. He is now known as pear.

After a few days, when the effects of EMR die down, the pear start to restructure itself in its genotype and phenotype. Genotically, it's completely different from what we now known as apple, and grows and reproduces differently. Phenotypically, the pear is green instead of red in colour, it resembles an ellipse, elongated sphere instead of a perfect, spherical one of an apple. It's also much nicer and fleshier to chew.

The fruit pear now exists in this world...


Story relay - Part1

Poh wei and I will now embark on a "Story Relay Writing" adventure. This means that which of us will take turn to continue the story. We hope that through this, we can relieve our build-up of stress and also to entertain and amuse those who visit this blog.


In the cold, cold silence of the morning, a lone boy, walked silently along the dimmly lighted street. Infact, it was so dim that the word "lighted" will cry in shame when used to describe the street. The boy plodded on, quietly. His face was twisted in anger, while his jaws were busy doing push ups. He was chewing an apple.

"Munch Munch Munch..." said his jaws.

"Plop, plop, plop," replied his feet.

"Chirp!" sang a bird who noticed a worm crawling out of its hole on the ground.

"Help!" whispered the worm, before darkness embraced it.

The boy plodded on... Only half of his apple was left. The other half was busy swimming in the digestive juices in his stomach. The boy stepped on something and that sometime said "squash!" The boy glanced down slowly, at the bloody mess on the ground, under his right foot. The sometime that said "squash" was infact what was remain of the worm. It only said "squash" because its remains was terribly mutated by a boy eating apple.

The boy, terrified at what he saw, dropped the apple onto the ground. The apple, being a specially enchanted one, began to emit Electromagnetic Radiation towards what was remain of the remains of the poor worm. Slowly, the DNAs of the remains grouped themselves together and began to reproduce. The organism cells and plant cells discarded their differences and consummated. A bright black light flashed through the street. The bird which had caused all this trouble flew away in alarm in search of other troubles to cause.

Slowly, but surely, the remains of what was remain of the worm and the half eaten apple combined themselves and grew legs, arms and a head. The head was not a prefect sphere, as it was eaten on one side. It grew eyes, ears, mouth and leaves. It did not grow any nose. The reason is simple: The boy have not bathed for days and it would be a mistake to grow a nose to smell it.

The creature, now aware of its own existence, spoke in a low tone, "My name is Apple."

"Er, what is a name?" the hyper intelligent creature questioned itself after a pause.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005


First Post

Hey guys, i m now a new member of Yahoo!Pot.

Not that i feel excited about being in this blog. In fact, i feel cheated lor. Our dear Wei Kiat has successfully conned me into joining the blog for god-know-what reason. And for god-know-what reason, i agreed to join. As you see, for god-know-what reason, i m now obliged to post god-know-what into this blog now.

(For ease of expression, i shall replace the phrase "god-know-what" with the word wicked)

Damn it, now i have to post sth, wicked things to post. And now i haf to post wicked lame things. I consider it to be both fortunate and unfortunate for wicked reasons, since i m now indoctrinated by wicked values by wicked weikiat. The fortunate thing is actually wicked nothing, cos of the poor wicked.

Eh, i feel lame now. Dont really know wicked to write. Wicked ask me to write wicked things out, and i dont noe wicked will happen to wicked post later, but i noe this wicked post is wickedly rubbish. Hey people, stop reading the wicked word 'wicked' lah, even i wicked know u wicked people wicked love him. It's wicked stupid and wicked crap lor. Never mind, wicked weikiat will wicked do to wicked kill me.

Anyway, this post is wicked lame. But never mind. According to some wicked survey, 56% of the wicked blogs are wicked lame and wicked nonsensical. This wicked survey is supported by another wicked survey, which wicked says that wicked 36% of the wicked surveys and statistics quotes are wicked false.

(Now wicked stands for wei kiat)

Dont worry lah, i m onli here to post crap, not to deprive u of marvellous wicked post. Ur dear wicked wont disappear or vanish into thin air. But dont blame me if wicked jumps into the sea after reading this wicked-like post. I noe u guys miss wicked, but he is currently having some wicked fun with FMATHS now. It's a subject which u people must take it if possible, cos it's as interesting as wicked. And wicked loves it wickedly.

I think my post is of wicked length now, so i shall sign off in the wicked way.


Welcome a new member to YahooPot

Koh Poh Wei, with is interesting dept of knowledge and uncanny ability to combine knowledge with his sense of humour is now a new member of blog.

This blog is now a blog shared between Wei Kiat and Poh Wei.

Monday, January 24, 2005


Ahha... Busy. Sian.

Yo.... too busy with games, chating and website this few days! And can't think of anything to post yet.
Anyway, check out my new web at .
It is hosted on a web space purchased by a friend of mine. Thank you so much!

The site is not 100% complete yet, so do expect some glitches.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005


No Times Newspaper Issue 1

A boring Birthday for Wei Kiat

Today, 18 of Jan, is the birthday of the well known and popular Tay Wei Kiat. He has various "AKA"s such as Robert, Mr Racist, Extra, Lame King... etc. Interestingly enough, although he led such an interesting lifestyle, his 17th birthday is as dull as a piece of stone lying on the road.

Despite the lack of exciting events, he received some gifts:
?? bucks from grandmother (Weikiat refused to accept. He secretly ask his grandfather to return the money to his grandmother)
50 bucks from his mother
12 bucks from his mother's eldest sister.
Nothing from his father.
A pen and a notebook from his sister.
A beethoven relaxing classics with Ocean Sounds from Amanda
A weird, funny and interesting mp3 from Koh Poh Wei
Fmaths tutorial one from Si Hui to copy.
A message from Zi Yan: "This is Zi Yan, wish you a happy birthday and may all your wishes comes true. Hopefully all the indians in this world can be destroyed"
A silence birthday song in an sms from Michele.
Someone whom he forgot sang a bit of BD song.
And Mother Nature gave him age.

I guess this sums it up for the uninteresting birthday that the interesting Wei Kiat led.

Reported by - Tay Wei Kiat

Monday, January 17, 2005


The story

This, is whatever that happened to the poor zebra fish who had the fortune to end up in Mr Jitsu's Fish Tank.
Surprisingly, its name is "Kilo"

(Darkness fade into brightness. Brightness fades into reality.)

Kilo: Wrr....
Kilo: Where am I? What is this place?
Kilo: Am I alive?
Lulo: No, you are not. This is hell. An hell contains me.
Kilo: Oh dear! I still have some unfinished business to attend to!
Lulo: What business?
Kilo: For one, I don't want to die a virgin.
Lulo: Oh, I can help you with that. What else?
Kilo: Really, well, no thank you. Another unfinished business is that I always wanted to tour around the world.
Lulo: But how?
Kilo: Well, I want to explore the sewage pipes in all the world, especially in the states, where people generally spend 20% of their time eating and another 20% of their time shiting. I want to take a look at how enjoyale such a form of lifestyle is.
Lulo: I see. I may be able to help you with that! I'm sick and tired of this place too, witnessing Mr Jitsu's freedom of expression everyday non-stop.
Kilo: So, er... You are willing to come with me?
Lulo: Why not?

(And with that, a freak worm hole opened up in one of the bubbles that was banged into existence by the Fish Tank's air plump. The bubble dissolved into the water and everything in the water dissolved in it.)

(Darkness once again, but this time in the colour of pink.)

Kilo: What the hell is this place?
Lulo: I totally have no idea...
Kilo: I seem to be having terrible problem with my lifestyle. One moment, I'm trapped with a useless Luo Han fish and in the next moment i ended up at somewhere pink and weird in the middle of nowhere.
Lulo: I beg your pardon? Who did you say is stupid?
Kilo: No no! Sorry! I don't mean it! I'm sorry!
Lulo: If sorry works, there will be no policefish in this world.
Kilo: There is nothing called Policefish!
Lulo: Yep, you are right here, but then, you are going to be REALLY REALLY sorry for what you have said. I'm going to give your wish.
Kilo: What did i wish for?
Lulo: You wished that you don't want to die a virgin.

To be continued...

PS: This does not comply with the reality as it was in the previous post. Its too boring and Mr Jitsu's expressions of passion are too unoriginal and unlame to mak its way into this blog.

Sunday, January 16, 2005


LuLo And Mr Jitsu

Public Service Announcement: This entry contains sexual content. If you feel that you belong to no gender, reading this entry might cause you to feel deprived and cause yo to commit suicide. Your death is not my responsiblity. Also, Kids under 16 years old are NOT allowed to view this entry. This is not a sex story. But it contains references to it.

Neocromancer: Juastiya Kukitpa Reportar De Soulum Restar Tahan!
The Soul of Reporter: Grrr.... I'm ALIVE!!!

2 days later....

The Soul of Reporter: Hi Robert! I'm back! And Im here to kill you!
Me: WOW! I So scare!
The Soul of Reporter: You better be!
Me: Why should I? You can't even comb pull your own ear. You are not a matter! How can you kill me?
The Soul of Reporter: I can learn the skill. The neocromance say i must do a report on you in order for him to teach me the power. So you better aswer my questions!
Me: What the fuck??
The Soul of Reporter: I don't care who you intend to fuck. First question: How is your life in AJC?
Me: Why should I help you kill me? Anyone who help anyone else to kill himself deserve to be dead more than anyone else.

(The Soul of Reporter took out a magical pill and push it into my ass. The pill is suppose to make the carrier answer all questions truthfully. It wears out after a certain amount of time.)

Me: Life in AJC is SU....ROCK!
The Soul of Reporter: Really?
Me: Really.
The Soul of Reporter: Did you have fun there?
Me: N..Yes!
The Soul of Reporter: Cool! Did you like any particular gal?
Me: Ye.....NOPE! I did .... n't
The Soul of Reporter: Which is th truth?
Me: This one.
The Soul of Reporter: What one?
Me: This what that one one.
The Soul of Reporter: Wht is that this one?
Me: That that is, is.
The Soul of Reporter: Very profound. I'll submit it to the "Nutcase, the best medicine" section of Reader's Diarroea.
Me: FUC... Fhan... Thank you you.
The Soul of Reporter: You are welcome. Now that i have got nothing from you, i may as well try to kill you right away.
Me: No, please don't. I know you can't kill.
The Soul of Reporter: I can.
Me: How?
The Soul of Reporter: I donno how.
Me: See, you are stupid.
The Soul of Reporter: Is that the god-damned truth? Nobody told me I'm stupid before. Thus i assume i am very smart.
Me: You are wrong. You are a stupid nutcase.
The Soul of Reporter: Oh dear.... Why? Why? Why didn't my mum make a bigger brain for me??? Why am i born stupid? Why did i die stupid? Why? This is such a terrible world! Its unfair! The world is torturing me! This is worst than hell!

(The The Soul of Reporter's brain spinned at 1rpm for 2 hrs. Then, he concluded:)
The Soul of Reporter: Since this place is worst than hell, i shall go to hell. Because hell is a better place.

(With that, he throw himself into a pile of shit lying outside. It turned out that the pile of shit was actually an indian selling durians. Anyway, since The Soul of Reporter is an anti-matter, and according to science, an anti-matter and matter collide to form energy, the Soul of Reporter was teleported into hell, while the Indian soul left its no longer existing body and went to heaven where he became the first durian seller cum night soil collector in heaven. He became a rich businessman by his newly acquired skill that enables him to turn shit into durian and vice versa. He remained as a respectable figure in Heaven until one day when a hungry ghost, mistaking him for a pile of either shit or durians, ate him up. He was later magically transformed into a pile of anti-matter shit in the ghost's stomach and later returned back to the world as what came to be known as Luo Han fish. The big lump on the head of the fish is infact a badly mishapened kidney of the Indian Durian/Shit seller.

As the Luo Han fish faze in Singapore grew, many people bought Luo Han fish home to torture. What remained of the Indian Durian and Shit Trader became known as a Luo Han fish named LuLo. He was sold to a rich merchant who owns a wife and many mistress. One of his favourite hobby is to fuck with his mistresses in his living room. When questioned, he explained that the many furnitures available in the living room enables a great freedom of expression. There is no need to express what he wants to express to you.

Incidentally, the fish tank where LuLo was inprisoned was thoughtfully placed in the living room. So months after months, LuLo enjoyed watching the merchant's (Mr Jitsu) nightly expressions of freedoms. LuLo wishs for company, so that he can express himself too.

He got it 2 weeks later, went one of Mr Jitsu's mistress gave him a zebra fish.

"The hole is too small for the stick!" He exclaimed when he took a good look at the zebra fish. He sighed. He feels cheated. However, Lulo's brain (actually mishapened liver) works hard. Instead of inserting into the hole, why not the mouth? He did so, and was satisfied with the result. Mr Jitsu saw what LuLo was doing to his beloved Zebra fish and thought that it was a good idea. He tried it on all his mistresses. Although he was afraid that his stick might get chewed off by a hungry mistress, he was relieved to discover that his stick was still intact. He liked this method of expression and told his friends about it. One of his friend, who is a professional oral examiner, decides to call it "Oral Sex". The name stuck.)

To be continued...

(Typos are unintended and no effort has been made to fix them. The same goes for any other kind of mistakes.)


Walking in the dark silence of the light.

[Walking in the dark shadows of the light] - Weikiat

In the dark shadows of the light,
I stood alone.
My head feels too tight,
and my skull feels like a tome.

In the faded silence of the hall,
bassoon melodies floated,
silenly to me it calls,
my fiery passion it bloats.

The space where she stood,
the place where she sat,
to me its like food,
making my love for her fat.

In the bitter fragance of the spicy love,
I think of her, needs her.
But only Jove
can pull us together.

Silently i wept,
at the long faded light,
the melodious music,
whats left is me,

Walking in the dark shadows of the light.


Try to make sense of it.

Evolution of ManKind - Tay Wei Kiat

In the beginning, there was nothing.
The vacant lands occupied all available lands.
Sea occupies many vacant spots.
Deep in the Earth, underwater volcanoes filled with robust energy.
The erupt, filling surrounding waters with utra high temperature.
Carbon molecules, excited by such heat, rearranges themselves into astonishing combinations.
One such combination is terribly unqiue in the sense that it can reproduce itself.

Life is born.

After a long long time, this single unique molecules reproduces into many different unqiue and distinct organsim.
These organisms constantly reproduce themselves, and through mutation, becomes more and more distinct.

Underwater sea creatures were born.

The sea is now overcrowded. Living things cannot away from a living thing withut bumping into another living thing.
To escape smelling each other's butt and armpit smell, certain creature(s) decided to leave his smelly pool an use its tails to push itelf onto the shore.
It discovers it likes the beautiful things called trees and sunshine.
It later discovers that it cannot breath and quickly went back into the water.
However, it decides to exercise itself by holding its breath and coming out of water to explore.
Soon, it stay on dry land for a few days without breathing.
Soon, it no longer needs to breath in the water, as its mutated child comes with a lung.

The mutated children of the mutated child also comes with flipper - like arms to help it move.

Since dry land is empty and big, it evolves and become clumsy and huge.

Dinosaurs are born.

However, some dinosaurs disable been called dinosaurs and slowly grow hair on their body and start developing the wonderfully beautiful, attractive and multi-purpose things called breasts.

Mammals are born.

One day, an alien zapped to earth and killed all the dinosaurs because a dinosaur had accidentally eaten its girlfriend's spaceship.

Only Mammals are left.

Mammals come in many different shapes and sizes.

Monkeys, been most cute and talkative, becomes very common due to their smelly armpit hair.

Some monkeys leave in highlands with tall grasses.
They have to be constantly on th lookout for predators that view them as food.
Because the tall grass kept blocking their view and because they are too stupid to cut down all the grass, they have to stand upright to be on the lookout for predators.

Since predators come very often because predators have no life, the poor monkeys have to stand upright for long long long time. They later find it impossible not to stand upright.

The tall grass also forms a prefect maze where they can explore it, get lost in it, get out of in, and come face to face with their predator. They then rush back into to the grass and get lost again. Their maze solving ability slowly developes as they become smarter.

At the mean time, these monkeys lose its abilities to swing from trees to trees as doing so on grass will cause them to plunge to their death.

Their body muscles becomes smaller, since it is useless.

Their brain becomes bigger.

Their head becomes bigger.

The female monkeys suffered.

Babies with bigger heads meant that those poor females who gave birth often died together with thir child because their opening is not big enough.

The Wise Ones held a meeting to solve this problem. In the end, they went around enlarging holes and smashing babies' skull into smaller bits so that the baby can go through the hole.

As their head is useless against smashing other heads, the first primitve tool is created to smash heads.

After the baby comes out, its skull will slowly join back together again.

Human, as they are today, was born.

Since our earlier monkeys has already decided against developement of body muscles, why should we bother about exercise? Our brain, which we had been dutifully developing all these years should be more often exercise.

Conclusion: Physical Education should be removed.

Monday, January 10, 2005


Poems are fun!

[I fought hard] - Tay Wei Kiat

In the cold cold silence of the morning,
the sarced sun in its sarced sleep.
Silent footsteps follows steady tapping,
I fought hard to fight back a weep.

Flashes of colours, brain pictures,
of the shadow of that lone girl.
Her bassoon singing the beauty of overture,
around her my arms wish to twirl.

When two bodies embraced,
the warmth wakes the sun,
with heartbeats in a race,
drumming louder than the thump of a gun.

Darkness fades into brightness,
cold resigned for the fire of passion.
Love, mysterious as Loch Ness,
kindled with the strenght of determination.

In the cold cold silence of the morning,
the sarced sun in its sarced sleep.
Silent footsteps follows steady tapping,
I fought hard to fight back a weep.

[Hairy Business] - Tay Wei Kiat

There is a hairy hand,
the hand attached to an arm,
it can cause lots of harm.

At the top intersection,
we see dark bushes,
there the barber insitution,
can't even turn it into ashes.

The bright holy circle on the head
reflects light in any and all directions,
thus he wears a hat,
to hide his ugly onion.

If he wears a wig,
and the wind blows,
he hit teasers with a twig,
and get the hair from below.

Sunday, January 09, 2005


I got a laptop!

Yeah, i got my first laptop!

And today, amanda gave me a BD present.

Happy beyond words.

Saturday, January 08, 2005


Solution for losers!

When loser lose, its time to face the failure in the loser's way!

Friday, January 07, 2005


When the sun goes down, its time for a summary!

[Summing it all up] - Tay Wei Kiat

Yo listen up, hey listen up,
listen and watch the weikiat speak!

What the hell, what the fuck?
AJC's facilities are very suck!
When when its time for a tuck,
the food is super duper suck!

I got into AJ,
not to be a DJ,
but in the end,
singing songs i did tend.

The phone went ringing,
in the middle of the evening,
and Wen Ya came on whispering:

"Hey come on now!
Do get down,
and put 25 in our wallet right now!"

The next day, on the train,
it was sunny and never rain,
I saw yao kun on the train,
staring intensively at an imaginary drain!

In the hall,
can't stand tall,
and it feels like siting in a waterfall;

Whats to come, is still unknown,
although AJC is Super renowned!

From that on, i made friends,
and learnt many things till the end;

Orientation's a toy.
Toy with it, you feel joy.
And you must never neglect it, till the foy!

Clap x11
Clap x11
Clap x3 Clap x3
Clap x11

Everywhere we go!
People want to know,
Who we are?
Where you come from!
So we tell them!

Wen Ya's short,
Yeok Heng is quiet,
and Yao Kun is very very blur!

Veti, Veti, any sweat?
No sweat (don't lie!) Pant! Pant! all the way!

In the camp,
we formed a racist gang.
Me, Duo Jie, Zhi Yan and Tee Hong,
and our laughter is louder than a gong!

And ladies and gentleman,
This is the END.

Thursday, January 06, 2005


Orientation day 4

Nothing interesting today. Spent the whole day playing with rubber bands. Very childish. Very fun. Very lame. Very interesting. Very amazing.

End of story.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005


That Kao Jun fucker.

[Fuck Kao Jun] - Tay Wei Kiat

Fuck that fucking fucker!
He sucks, he stinks, he shits

I despise him more than Indians,
Because is such a big fucker.

He got 10, I got 10
He hear his mother go HC,
so that his mum can be proud,
proud of her seriously hopeless son?

He get 10, why hopeless?
because he only know how to du si shu.
His has no life, has no face,
resort to stupid underhand methods.

To go HC he chosed arts,
because his mum wants a lawyer son.
But look at him! Just look at him?
Chinese speak like retarded,
English speak like cocks croaking.

But the blind luck went to him,
a stupid ACS wants a switch,
switched from science stream to arts stream,
allowing Kao Jun to go science stream.

Fuck it up, fuck it up!
Life is so very much unfair.
He get 10, I get 10,
He went HC and me AJ



Poems and more poems

[Missing Amanda] - Tay Wei Kiat

Amanda's not missing,
but she's what I thinking.
She leaves me pondering,
because she's always interesting.

She is amazing,
her character is more than just a maze,
and my liking for it is never a faze,
successfully making me such a craze.

Amanda's not missing,
but she did arouse my missing,
she went to camp making my head a mist,
and that's just the gist.

She's back on Saturday,
and that's when i shout "ay".
because my surname's tay,
and its my day.

She is unbelievable,
she makes anything seems possible,
making her very approachable,
thus she is nothing but incredible.

Amanda, Amanda!
She can drive me bananas,
But I don't mind,
Because i want her always in my mind.

[Orientation day 3] - Tay Wei Kiat

What could have been didn't be,
I could have gone HC but never did,
Is this fate or is this crap?
Who the hell would know the truth?

On this day, things are crap.
Games are super duper crap.
This seems like a trap,
but worst to come is AJC rap.

Why? Why? Why am i here?
Why can't I be at another "where"?
This is so unfair and never rare,
Fairness is something i never wear.

HC HC where are you?
Know i want to go there didn't you?
Why didn't you let me go with you?

This is crap,
very crap,
and this is not a poem but a rap.

A stupid rap; a crappy crap,
how i wish to kill all crabs.

Fuck it all, suck it all,
whole day sit in stupid hall,
never a chance to walk tall,
happiness there was very small.

Sian ah sian ah its so sian,
How i want to fly to tian,
where happiness is going to crush me pian,
and there are clouds to be my dian.

AJC, so damn young,
sit there for just 20 years,
but look so run down look so old,
85 years TCHS is more new.

What the hell? Why get 10?
Why shouldn't I have gotten 9?
Been here is like on a knife,
a very very small and painful knife.

Life so suck,
now got stuck,
at a place so small there's nothing to see,
unless you want me to drown in the sea.

Fuck it.
Suck it.
I go fly kite,
In the dark gloomy night.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005


AJC Orienation Day2

[Life in AJC today] - Weikiat

Today is the day,
i yelled and shouted "Ay!"
We cheer and cheer all day,
Not because my surname's Tay.

"We win like champions, win,
We fight like idiots fight,
We win like champions fight like idiots all the rest can go fly kite!
Fly Kite!
Fly KITE!"

Mambo no5 was my favourite song,
my dancing is sotong,
and dance with rgs very shong,
and its more tiring than playing ping pong.

Orientation day 2 no more.
But cannot get my orientation shirt tore.
Yesterday tee hong got eyes sore,
today he got no more.



Been stuck in AJC is indeed interesting. To find out more about the school, I've embarked on some research, and here's what I dug out:

[Lesbian in AJC exposed!]
Click Here
Click Here for a big picture.
WOW! Those 2 girls are really daring...

Do you think it is really a "Silly Prank"? Or is it something else??

Who knows? We may never find out...

[Anti-anderson alumni]
Click Here

Although the site seems useless, someone seems to hate Anderson VERY much..
Luckily I'm still neutral.

[What competition?]
Click Here
I don't think any other schools take part in it.

[Thinkquest Entries]
Click Here
Click Here
See? Typical web design by Anderson JC students. They are ultra non-creative, which is quite unlike me. :P

Anyway, the main purpose of doing such a research is to find the photo of Mr Tan, principal of anderson JC, for photo editing. He has big ears, similar shape to that of an elephant. However, I'm unable to locate it.

I have edited my ex-principal's photo:

But with my itching hands, I can't resist the Lesbian Photo.

You know, having Lesbians kissing in a class photo is very embarrasing. Why shouldn't they edit the photo?
Well, although i'm not good with photoshop, I tried, and here's the result:

Original Picture:

The offending part is now removed by me:

Monday, January 03, 2005


Anderson JC Orientation 2005

Today is a good mixture of fun, anger and lameness.
Since it is a fun, angry and lame day, i shall use a fun, angry and lame tone to report today's happenings.


Woke up. Eyes very heavy. No, eye lids very heavy. So heavy i feel like doing a workout by opening them. Close eyes, went back to sleep.

Alarm on my useless Nokia 3100 handphone went off, doing what it is most good at -- waking me up. After doing a terrible workout, i groped my way to the bathroom. Wash face. Put my toothpaste on my toothbrush. Briefy considered eating it (the paste, not the brush) but was against the idea because the toothpaste don't taste delicious enough. Groped to my sister's room. Woke her up by shouting: "Time to go to your new school: SCGS!!"

When back to my room. Striped. Put stupid TCHS buttons and badge on uniform. Wear. Feel good. Find shorts. Put deodourant.(Did i mentioned i got BO? No? Of course! I don't! Just put for fun.) Prepare bag. Put discman inside. Start playing Speed Up2 Disc1.

Stomachache. Go toilet

Finished business. Eat bread.

Dug out socks. Sister take bath. I heck about bath so early in the morning. I normally bath at night.

Nothing to do at home. Left home.

Wow, i walk so fast. Reached LRT station.

LRT comes. Board.

Reached Chua Chu Kang MRT station. See lots of students. I think they all go anderson.

MRT comes. Board. Sat down opposite an AJC guy. SIAN!

Listening to track 6 of my CD

Listening to track 6 of my CD

Listening to track 6 of my CD.

Discovered i accidentally pressed the "Repeat this track" feature on the remote control. Disabled it.

Finally reached track 10

Reached MRT station. So early. SMSed friends to meet earier. So many girls at MRT station. WOW. Lame. What's there to wow about? I must stop wow-ing. A wow-er is a country pumkin. I don't live in the country and i don't like to eat pumkin. I should not "wow".

Called Darren. Ask him why he haven't reached yet.

Attempted to call Reng Hao. His HP is off.

Darren is here. Toking crap.

Reng Hao reached. Moved off to AJC

Entered AJC. Saw too pple who looked like PE teachers standing there. SIAN!

Went up to hall. Donno where to sit. Went down to check notice board. Went up again. Sat down. My grp leader happens to be the AJC guy on MRT. Paid 25bucks to someone. Forgot who.

Tok to the guy beside me to make a new friend. Success. His name is Chua Tee Hong.

Don't recall doing anything much except looking around at girls. TCHS is a boys sch. No gals. Here got gals. Weird. Funny. Exciting. Interesting. Amazing. Lame. Me.

No idea what happened.

Reached Auditorium. Interesting colour for the chairs. Weird shade of green. The designer must be in a lame mood when he designed it. Weird tables too. It swings around in a strange way and makes it easy for it to swing back down allowing your belongings to fly your towards the ground. Maybe the ground is a nice thing for things to fly towards to.

Principal Comes. HODs comes. Start of a boring talk. GRP Leaders on my left. New found friend on my right. Kept joking and toking lame stuffs. FUN!

The first victim. Her items slipped offed and dropped on the floor.

Second Victim.

Third victim. Silently laughing. VIce prinicpal tok finish. Relieved.

Oops. Now the HOD's turn to talk.

Go toilet with new found friend. Saw girls. Smell toilets. Exited toilet. Walked SLOWLY back.

Legs ache. Shivering teeth which creates wonderful melody. Heard the Auditorium is famous for freezing people to death. Oh no. I don't want to be in a haunted school.

Ice breaking in hall. Don't feel cold liao. Self Introduce. Attempt a fruitless attempt to remember names.
Qing ting
Yu Hua
Jia Min??? (RGS!!)
Wei kiat
Tee Hong

Fruitless attempt. No hope. Eat lunch. Got otah and chicken. Bad food. No vegtable. I might die from heart attack when i visit my own blog because of such diet. People say i eat slow. Hey, the food sucks, I don't like eating infront of so many girls. No ideas what girls are before today.

What is a girl? According to it is a

1. A female child.
2. An immature or inexperienced woman, especially a young woman.
3. A daughter: our youngest girl.
4. Informal. A grown woman: a night out with the girls.
5. A female who comes from or belongs to a particular place: a city girl.
6. Offensive. A female servant, such as a maid.
7. A female sweetheart: cadets escorting their girls to the ball.

I think is very intuitive. Ya?

Eat finish. Go down with that MRT AJC and Tee hong to carry orientation goodies. 3 boxes in all. One box with 9 sets of clothes and folders and foolscrape paper. One box with 15. One box ith water bottle. MRT AJC turns out to be a lazy bum. Only take the water bottle box. Its damn light. My box is the 15 folder one. Heavy.

Reached hall again. Hand slightly ache.

Change clothes. I'm now a AJC student. Not dramatic and not happy.

Time out.

Doing nothing. Becos nothing to do. Pierced the AJC badage into the orientation booklet. Feeling lame. Must express my lameness.

Some weird skit. The skit actress very chio. WOW. WOW. (I must stop wow-ing!!!)

Skit finished. Sian.


Reached MPH. Cheer practice. Lame cheer.
fight to win, win to fight or smth.
All the rest can go fly kite.
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
Fly kite
I suddenly want to play with kites.
But i simply LOVE this cheer. Fits my character.

All quiet cos cheering banned. Briefing given by someone who wants to be tall by standing on a chair.
Game tour rules: go each area, search for plastic bag. Get clue for next area to go. Damn fun. Really.

Game started. Go Tennis court.

Go LT3.

GO reading room.

Go Nexus

Go "area outside auditorium"
Final challenge.
So hard. I am someone who can get lost if you throw me in a toilet i never when before. How can i help them piece the map??

Map pieced. Interesting. Got it wrong.

Got it wrong again.

Got it correct. So happy. But we are later than most teams.

Ice breaking game again. Self intro again. Seems like everyone is as forgetful as I am. Me first to self intro. The MRT AJC guy say must shout. I shouted. Damn loud. Kana clapped. Now everyone knows my name. How cool.

Start game. Play "whacker"( no idea wat its called.) The game goes like this:

pple sit in 2 circle. (One inner, one outer)
Center person hold a useless whacking tool make up of a rolled up paper. Incredibly resourceful and high tech.
Center person shout out a name. The person behind the person with this name must shout out another person's name to prevent the person infront of him from been whacked. Games go on.

The whacked must be the next whacker.

I became damn Popular. My name easy to remember, and i shout so loud. Lasting impression. Kana whacked innocently for 3 times, even though the person behind me already shouted out another name.

Who ask me to be so extra and so lame? My fault indeed. My fault. Really.

Play Husband and wife. Sit in one circle. Male and female alternate. Stand up. HOLD HANDS
WOW! First time hold hand with 2 girls. WOW! WOW!
Incredible sensation! WOW! Amazing! WOW! My sacred hands.
(I am wow-ing again...)
Okok. I'm lameing. As usual. Don't you know i like to be lame? Lameing allows you to enjoy life to the fullest.
Everyone should become lamer like me.

Game goes like this:
an lucky "couple" must walk around the exterior of the circle, touch the "connection" (the together held hands) of another "couple" in the circle. This touch will cause the couple in the circle to run around the circle, opposite direction to the first couple who will run one round and try to occupy the 2nd couple's vacancy.

3 couples failed.

The girl on my left says its impossible to win. How ironic.

Our connection got touched. Her reaction damn fast. Off she went, at the speed of light, and off i go, tagging after her, still holding hands. Run and run. Must win.

Overshot the gap in the circle. Ran back. Won. Amazing. We are that fast!

Bell ring. Times up. It effectively end the first time i hold hand with a girl.

[[The School Bell]] - Tay wei kiat

The school bell,
is like hell.

It ends happiness,
kills all the nurse.

Who invented it?
Him i'll eat.

The bell.
The hell.

The killer of fun.

Cheering put up by all councillors. Loud and good. Nothing else.

We learn the cheer. So we cheer als0.

"Dagda" go clean washroom"
Wah! WTF???

"Don't worry. Just flush toilet can already"
And off we went.

Time to go. Wait for reng hao. Never turn up. Heck. Left school.

Reached MRT station

Thinking about nderson's mickey mouse/elephant-like principal. (The ears, not the colour)

Reached Chua CHu Kang MRT
Changed to LRT

Smsed poh wei. Discover JAMES TAN when to HCI. He got 13 pts. I got 10pts. That fucker. He use CO to appeal. I think he will be kicked out soon, or retained for a year, and then kicked out.

Still feeling angry

Reached Home. A AJC JC1 gal also live in fajar. Interesting. Red dress. Is she fron BPGH??

Sat in the toilet.

Shower. Feels wonderful.



Sunday, January 02, 2005


GooGNews advertisement

GooGNews- Good News for Google News Users

A customizable, user-friendly and FREE toolbar that allows you immediate access to the lastest Google headline news, GooGNews is a must-have for users who wants to be constantly updated with the lastest events or happenings, and armed with the lastest piece of information that is made availabe on the Internet.

Why not just go to Google News? Keeping a browser open all the time just to keep abreast of the news is not always practical. GooGNews comes to the rescue! Don't miss out on the news just because you don't want to open a web browser!

With GooGNews, users no longer need manually browse through scrolls of irrevelant news in the Google News to obtain the information they wanted. No longer do they need to check their mail more than frequently to be updated with the lastest headline news. GooGNews do so much work of you, that it makes news browsing seems so easy, fast and convenient.

And it won't take up much space in your desktop. The headline of all Google news are summarized and displayed in just one line, taking up approximately only 5% of your total desktop space!

Moreover, GooGNews comes with a powerful search bar. The bar allows you to search all major search engines and dictionaries. Before is a full list of search engine services that you can access directly through GooGNews Search Bar:
-Google Web
-Google Images
-Google Groups
-Google News
-Open Website (You may enter website address here to open the that website)
-Spell Check (Powered by
-Yahoo! Web
-Yahoo! Images
-Yahoo! Directory
-Yahoo! News
-Msn Web
-Msn News
-Msn Dictionary
-Msn Encarta
-Msn Stock Quotes
-Msn Movies
-Msn Shopping
(Users may request the author to add more search services to GooGNews Search Bar by sending a feedback to the author via the built in "Submit Feedback" feature in GooGNews, which can be accessed by Menu -> Help -> Submit Feedback)

Below are detailed breakdown of other features/options found in GooGNews and additional information about their usage.

1)Show Latest News Only
Use: On average, Google News Homepage contains 100++ news articles. It may seem like a good idea to display all of these news on GooGNews. In actual fact, many of the news are actually repeats. Google News works by pushing each related News one "step" down whenever a newer version of the same News is discovered. Hence, by activating "Show Latest News Only" feature, GooGNews automatically filter out older News and display only the latest. This allows you to be constantly updated about what is happening around the world without reading through all the 100++ News.
How to access: Menu->Show Latest News Only

2)Fast Scrolling
Use: Everyone read at a different speed. The default scrolling speed of headlines in GooGNews may be too slow for some, thus there is a need to provide fast readers another options. Enabling Fast Scrolling increases the scrolling speed drastically.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Fast Scrolling

3)Auto Refresh News
Use: News are not static. Updates can appear anytime. Hence, it is necessary to be updated about happenings around the world constantly. Enabling this option will cause GooGNews to automatically "Refresh News" every 30 minutes, which is not long enough for you to miss out any News update, while not short enough for you to finish going through all 100++ News if you want to.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Auto Refresh News

4)Quick View
Use: Whenever you do a search using GooGNews Search bar or click on any scrolling News article, GooGNews will attempt to launch the website. GooGNews gives you the options of viewing the website in your default web browser, or using the built in web browser in GooGNews. Enabling Quick View allows you to launch web pages using the built in browser, while disabling it cause GooGNews to lanuch web pages using your default browser. Quick View is enabled by default, and highly recommended as Quick View saves you the trouble of waiting for your web browser to load.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Quick View

5)Vibration Alert
Use: Whenever GooGNews is ready to start scrolling the latest headlines from Google News, the main GooGNews bar will vibration for a short amount of time, at the same time displaying the number of valid News articles it detected. Vibration alert engage your attention whenever News update is available.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Vibration Alert

6)Google News Home
Use: You may sometime feel the need to visit the Google News Homepage. Clicking on this allows you to do so directly.
How to access: Menu->Google News Home

7)Auto Snap To Screen Edge
Use: If this option is enabled, moving GooGNews near to any of your screen edge will cause GooGNews to automatically dock at the edge.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Auto Snap To Screen Edge

8)Set Transparency
Use: Do you like/dislike the default see-through property of GooGNews bar? Change the transparency of GooGNews by using this option.
How to access: Menu->More Options->Set Transparency

9)Submit Feedback
Use: Feed that you have any suggestions/feedbacks/comments/complaints you want to make to the author? Submit your feedback via the built in Submit Feedback system!
How to access: Menu->Help->Submit Feedback

10)GooGNews Update Manager
Use: This feature is normally hidden. It attempts to check for any GooGNews update whenever GooGNews is used. If no update is found, the update manager will quietly close itself. However, if an update is found, a dialog will be displayed, providing you with relevant information about the update and how to get it.
How to access: Menu->Help->Submit Feedback

Use: Select Notebox from the menu launches a seemingly useless window which consisted of nothing but an empty textbox and a "Save" button. Infect, Notebox is quite useful. When using Quick View, you can select text from the built in web browser and drag it into the textbox in Notebox window. Pressing the save button allows you to save the textbox's content in either plain text or rich text format.
How to access: Quick View Options->Notebox

12)Spell Check
Use: Need to spell a word and simply can't recall how to spell it? No fear! GooGNew's latest feature, Spell Check allows you to check your spelling directly from the GooGNews Search bar!
How to access: Enter roughly what you think is the correct spelling of the word in the GooGNews Search bar and select "Spell Check" from the drop down list. Press enter. A dialog will shortly appear, telling you if the word is spelled correctly and giving suggestions if it is not. This feature makes use of to do the checking.

13)Open Website
Use: For your convenient, we can now select "Open Website" from the drop down combo of the Search Bar and enter the address of the website you wish to launch and have GooGNews open it for you either via GooGNew's built in browser or your default browser, depending on your settings.
How to access: Select "Open website" from the drop down combo of the search bar and enter the url of the website you want to open into the textbox on the left. Then, press enter.

(Other features/options not mentioned here are pretty much self-explanatory and the user should be able to determine the use of the features/options. If however any help is needed, you may reach Wei Kiat through the built in submit feedback feature.)

GooGNews Version History

Version 2.1b
-Modified the Update Manager so that it will not auto exit when the "Download Latest" button is pressed.
-Fixed a bug that causes scroller to continue scrolling even when it is not supposed to.
-Removed the "beep" sound when enter was when filling up the textbox in GooGnews search bar.
-New better looking "About" dialog.

Version 2.1
-Fixed a bug that causes webpage launch to be possible when GooGNews is vibrating.
-Changed Quick View Options button to "Quick View Menu"
-Built-in spelled check that extracts result from
-The last search engine used in the previous session of GooGNews will be selected in the next session.
-Added progress bar for quick view browser
-Slightly repositioned "Quick View Menu" button and "^ Close Quick View" button.

Trouble Shooting

If GooGNews is unable to run on your computer, you may try the following solutions:

Problem: When running GooGNews, a "Beep" sound is heard and GooGNews does not excutes.
Solution: Right click on GooGNews.exe, select properties, switch to the "Compability" tab and switch the Compability mode to "Windows 2000"

Problem: "MSVBVM60.DLL" not found error when running GooGNews
Solution: VB6 runtime files are not installed. You may download them from:

Problem: "Msinet.ocx" or "Richtx32.ocx" not found error"
Solution: You need to extract ALL files into the same folder as GooGNews for GooGNews to work. For windows 95 and 98, you need to register Msinet.ocx and Richtx32.ocx on your computer. More information can be found on Microsoft's webpage.

(If you experience any problems not found here and feels that it is not a unqiue case, you may reach Wei Kiat through the built in submit feedback feature.)


Dear Users,

Don't you just love quality freewares? Freewares that don't include bundled nonsense and advertisements that we don't even look at? I hate such crap as much as you do!! That's why all my freewares come with no string attached!!

You may be wondering, why would creating search a simple freeware incur cost? The answer is simple. To code, you need a computer, and a computer use a large amount of electricity. This is just one of the many examples of how cost is incurred by just creating a freeware.

However, the sad truth is that although this freeware was developed mostly out of interest and passion for programming, some cost are incurred in the process. Thus, although I dislike the idea of covering such costs by bundling nonsenses with my freeware, these costs need to be accounted for in one form or other.

Also, I'm currently only a student schooling in one of the top schools in this country. This means that although I wish to, I just could not find time to get any part time job to add on to my small amount of pocket money. My parents are not rich, and they only make enough to go by. Even this computer I'm using right now is sponsored 100% by my dad's company. Buying a computer is an unthinkable burden, even though computers are getting cheaper and cheaper each day.

To sum it up, I would like a small donation from you if you are generous enough. Any amount would do, as it would be a great help to me. Gifts in the form of electronic products are also welcomed. To protect my privacy, i shall no post any mailing information here. Instead, if you are kind enough to donate, please contact me at

Yours truly,
Tay Wei Kiat
Developer of GooGNews

Special Thanks To:

Koh Poh Wei (Documentation & Alpha Testing)
Koh Poh Kiat (Alpha Testing)
Teh Ming Han (Alpha Testing)
Ee Jin Guan (Alpha Testing)
Mok Li Qian (Alpha Testing)
Teng Eng Kuan (Alpha Testing)
Lim Yang Xiang (Alpha Testing)

And all others whom i have unintentionally left out.

Screenshoot url:
Download url:


A new Year

A new year

2004 is gone,
I am alone.
And there's no way to clone,
my doom shaped dome.

2005 is here,
Or so i hear,
Since i have a ear.
Cos this is a new year

A new year to be lame,
a new way to be caned,
and a new method to be in shame.

A new new year's a new sadness,
with no one to nurse
my fuckiness.

Me at anderson.
Because i'm not Mr Anderson,
Whom Neo defeat till he can't see anymore sun.

Created something called GooGNews,
The only program that can extract google news.
Staring at scrolling tsunami news,
I don't think its something new.

Came back to visit my own blog,
with a terrible mental block.
Its time to be lame, says the tag-board
so here i am posting this blob.


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