Wei Kiat's Blog

Feb 7, 2006
Sexuality workshop an eye-opener for teens

IN THE article 'Students cry foul over sexuality workshop that pushed these messages' (Sunday Times, Jan 29), reporter Jeremy Au Yong said a four-hour workshop of the Family Life Society irked some students.

It was held under the Education Ministry's guidelines to provide sexuality education for upper secondary and tertiary students. He said the teachings were 'too strong' because it discouraged contraception, abortion, in-vitro fertilization and human embryonic stem cell research and allegedly infringed on other freedoms of thought.

As a parent of two adult sons, a practising doctor, and a volunteer helper in orphanages locally and overseas, I am grateful to see that the Family Life Society is bringing traditional values on sexuality to the sexually active young here.

As a young medical student, I learned about infectious diseases such as gonorrhoea and syphilis. We saw men and women in venereal disease clinics with fear in their eyes as they passed pus from their genitalia in pain. We also saw the tears of women who had repeated strictures of the fallopian tubes because of venereal-transmitted disease. These women remained sterile.

Later, I would be one of the first to see the early cases of HIV and Aids in the United States. There was fear in the partner, knowing that to contact Aids was a death sentence and ostracism from their sexual partners.

At an orphanage overseas, we find that without the exceptional love of the care-givers, these orphaned children would be dead.

Some children were dumped on the streets by the single mums. If they were lucky and got picked up, they were saved. In other instances, abandoned babies could be eaten by hungry dogs.

Locally, in one of the new homes for 'battered children, and teenaged mums in crises', we try to provide them a shelter until the mum can complete her studies and learn her trade. I wondered. Was this a price of the freedom of sexual expression?

When my teenaged sons were growing up, my wife and I would reflect on the question 'what if both of us died suddenly, who would look after them? What if they picked up bad moral values and would not listen to our counselling?' My experiences in a public school helped me to guide my sons but like in my time, masturbation and homosexual behavior were not rare in the schools, though dating with the opposite sex was not frequent. We were free and unrestrained in what we wanted to do as long as we did not breach school discipline.

Family Life Society has its opponents. While it champions responsible parenthood, the sanctity of marriage, the sexual act within marriage, and the precious value of all human life (regardless of how weak that life is), it also actively discourages euthanasia in all forms, such as contraception (where sperms are killed), abortion (where life is intentionally terminated), and embryonic stem cell research (where the hapless human life is destroyed).

My sons are now responsible professionals. While we disagree from time to time, my wife and I still keep our traditional values.

The teenage sexually active school children here have been given an eye opener. It is now their choice.

Dr Gabriel Oon Chong Jin

First of all, FUCK OFF!

Such talks were not critised by students because it pushes those messages strongly. For example, it would be good if teenagers understand that things like prematial sex and abortion are bad, but you must at least present both sides of the coin. Certain things may be immoral, but if you ruin the girl's future just because you taught her that abortion is bad, you are a preacher from Satan, not god. It is the fact that such a talk was not conducted in a secular fashion, and rather, in a fashion that may upset those with firm believes in their own religion which may contradict that of the catholics. Imagine some hard core people or religion A, siting in the hall. The talk may end with that student going on stage and blasting that speaker into pieces.

Even when Mao or Stalin tries to spread communism, at least the origins and concept behind communism was made known, so that people can willingly accept it whole heartedly. In this case, everyone was forced to have the same believes with that of the catholics without regard for their believes or individual right. This is worst than communism! And how can you expect anyone to sit there for 4~5 solid hours listening to that guys preaching while trying to do what his disclaimer says "In one ear, out another." 4 hours of that? Its a waste of time. 4 hours of trying not to listen to what someone has to to say over the loud speaker? Impossible! Tell me how to "in one ear, out another" in that case. Something is bounded to get in. And finally, if we were to walk out of the auditorum, the teachers will be pounding after us. It all boils down to the fact that we were not given any choice. The converse is true.

Actually, there is one point which i agree with. I agree with Gabriel's opinion that such talk open our eyes. Indeed, it open our eyes by showing us video of a guy masturbating and even guy and gal consumating in the Blue Lagoon movie. It opened everyone's eyes to such an extend none of them are innocent and naive anymore. We were all polluted by ideas and vision of how sex and masturbating look like on that day forward. All thanks to the talk which opened our eyes.

Finally, lets look at this

The teenage sexually active school children here have been given an eye opener. It is now their choice.

How is making us write down things like "I must condemn IVF" making our own choice. We were told to accept their ideas, or leave it, although as stated earlier it is next to impossible to ignore the speaker's ranting for 4 solid hours. The speaker did not ask us to make a choice. He already made the choice for us: Become a catholic.